Spam

Good news. I was able to get up in time for free breakfast.

Then I went back to sleep around one. I sent out some emails to get work. I was just noticing my calendar today. I’ve got one weekend open until April. That’s pretty good.

but for the last hour, I’ve been trying to get a bootleg movie to stream on my computer. The problem is this hotel internet isn’t co-operating. You can’t just click play and sit back. It doesn’t load faster than it plays. So now I’ll write a blog while it loads.

Sometimes when you go to these sites there’s like 100 pop up ads, even though I have a pop up blocker, they come through anyway.

It always gets me thinking. How effective is that? Whats the purpose of that? They just want clicks? There can’t possibly be that many stupid people clicking on a link that says “Make a million dollars from home on google. Click here.”

If I found a way to make a million dollars at home, I don’t know if I would tell my best friends, let alone set up a instructional website that pops up every time you try to watch porn.

Does that really trick people? A pop up ad? It reminds me of when I had a girlfriend, we would walk through the mall. All the black guys (sorry – I’ve never seen a white guy do it. It’s a thing.) That holler out anything to get her attention: “Ay ma. Ay. Ay girl.”

That can’t POSSIBLY get you laid ever. But it had to have worked ONE TIME or guys would never do it again. Right? Isn’t our whole lifestyle based on a series of mistakes or rewards? Tell the dog to sit, when he sits, give him a treat. The dog sits whenever you want him to now, hoping to get a treat.

Anyway, that’s a whole Anjelah Johnson thing I won’t get into. Especially on stage. I’m not here to talk about how black people do this and white people do this.

Clearly, it’s a numbers game on both ends. It doesn’t work often, but enough to keep trying. Or guys are just stupid. Don’t ask me. I don’t have to approach girls anymore. They just email me after shows. 🙂

I was always a conversation guy though. I did the club thing, I’ve done the online thing, I’ve had friends set me up. That’s a blog post I’ve never written. Every time Adam tries to set me up, it’s terrible.

He set me up with a girl one time, we did a show together, she came out and told him she wasn’t looking for anything serious. He said “perfect. I know a guy.” I meet this girl, she’s not that cute but that’s every girl he tries to hook me up with. I think all my friends and I disagree on attractiveness. We’re talking and next thing you know she tells me about her boyfriend in Oklahoma. I’m like what?

There is a certain group of women who find me irresistable though, they’re called sixes.

Closing on a joke I’ve probably used already. This is the life for me.