Top Gun

Here’s something I’ve complained about a lot on the blog. Traveling makes staying healthy really difficult. I know that sounds like an asshole thing to say when you look at me. This isn’t healthy, this is just poor. I can’t afford to get fat.

Plus just because I have a decent metabolism doesn’t mean I’m healthy on the inside. Imagine your body is a car, you can wash it, and make it shiny, but if you’ve run up a lot of miles and instead of gasoline you were running on cheesburgers. Shit’s gonna break down a little faster.

I got off the road in April and I started watching my food. I cut out Soda and Ice Cream for a whole month, I ran every day. I lost 5 pounds. I feel a lot better throughout the day too. Not only that. Downstairs has been reaping some benefits. I’ll save you too much details, but I feel like I’m 19 again.

Not that I ever used it when I was 19, so I actually can’t attest to that. Which brings my to the other favorite topic my dad likes to read about on this blog. Porn.

I’ve kinda glossed over it at times, but I had a really unhealthy relationship with Porn for years. I started watching it when I was 16 or so like every other kid, but I really watched it way too much around 19 or 20. But not for pleasure. Because I didn’t have sex until I was 21. In my mind, I was doing research. You don’t want to show to the game and not know how to play. When the movie 40 year old virgin came out. I was a 20 year old virgin. So that movie wasn’t that funny. I was taking notes, like note: Not bags of sand. It’s a ridiculous idea that you can learn about sex by watching porn. Because they do things I can only hope to do ONE DAY. Like last more than 3 minutes. HEYNOW. But seriously. Those guys are professionals, at the top of their game. I’ve seen the movie Top Gun like 100 times, I still can’t fly a Jet or Play Volleyball.